Alexa Babin

The start of this week had me down, I’ll go ahead and admit it right up front. I was feeling a little sad for no apparent reason. I couldn’t tell you what triggered it or why, but I had a sense of heaviness and… you guessed it… discouragement.

We get discouraged for a variety of reasons, and my best guess is that this week, the circumstances of life caught up to me. I had a restful weekend after an insanely busy few days last week, and I think slowing down for a couple of days made just enough space for deeper feelings to rise to the surface. I got comfortable enough for the dissatisfaction to show up.

To say it briefly, I’m wary of the state of the entertainment industry right now. I’m sad at all the lost jobs, unfair wages, and overall lack of work that so many people are experiencing (and have been for quite some time now). It’s hard not to feel discouraged when you think about it for too long. This week, I’ve been feeling it more than usual. Uncertain about where to go from here, or how to press on, or what the best next step may be in terms of the big picture.

But staying idle and wallowing in this reality is not the answer. Feel it, yes. But find a way to keep going, too.  

Today, I did my best to regroup. To pivot. To deal with the sense of discouragement with a few of the ways I’ve learned over my years of living in Los Angeles.

The morning started with a workout – my favorite 7 a.m. class at the gym. Even though I slept past my alarm, I busted my tail to make it on time. That little win in and of itself felt good and began to fight back against the discouragement I felt the last couple of days. Tiny victories, y’all. Movement almost always helps more than I think it will, and it’s certainly worth the effort. It’s a sweet release, and it got my day off to a delightful start.

I’ve also found that working on something I care about helps instill a sense of purpose to my days and pushes back against the feeling of uselessness that tends to creep in if I’m not careful. I’m not talking ultimate, existential purpose, but daily purpose—as in how I’m going to spend the waking hours I have at my disposal. So today, that looked like getting together with a writer friend and discussing a project we’re collaborating on. It was satisfying to exercise my brain in a fresh way (fueled by a little coffee, of course). I have a theory that perhaps this works because it’s a distraction from the discouragement rather than a head-on way of dealing with it. But hey—if productive, meaningful distraction helps get the ball rolling… I say go for it.

Friendship and vulnerability are great antidotes to discouragement, too. I had a lovely catch up with a good friend this afternoon, and while all our life updates weren’t glimmering, rosy triumphs, it was comforting to know that we’re never in our hardships alone. And sometimes an encouraging word (whether given or received) can do a lot more good than we realize.

But perhaps the best way to ward off discouragement, for me, is to let it go. Let it roll off like raindrops from the edge of my sleeve. Focus on others, on something bigger and outside of myself. That’s right—shift the perspective away from the discouragement and onto better things. Easier said than done, I know. At times, I feel mentally incapable of this, but I’ve learned that over time, this shift works well. It’s hard to feel down while contributing to a larger mission, cause, or community. So today, I prayed with a group of people I’d never met. Not for them as much as with them, really. It was fabulous. And it totally shifted my thinking away from everything that isn’t going as well as I’d want and made me feel hopeful for all the beauty that’s both present and on the way.

There’s not one clear-cut, sure-fire way to handle discouragement, but today, that’s what worked for me. Movement, meaningful work, vulnerable friendship, and connection to something outside myself.

Maybe it’ll work for you, too.